Conflicted

"Conflicted" is a word that comes to mind. Ordinarily I am not one to believe in all of that astrological mumbo jumbo, but there seems to be at least a relative amount of outside evidence. I seem to be suffering from mental confusion due, I believe, to mental conflict.

I am quite well aware that everyone uses both sides of their brain--ok, there are a few terrible exceptions, but the point remains--one side is usually dominant. I seem to be confused as to what side of my brain is dominant. I am right handed and right footed, implying that I am left brained; I can only wink with my left eye and, when driving one handed, drive with my left hand, which implies that I am right brained. I focus constantly on logic, try to have everything as organized as possible, and am extremely detail-oriented... but I'm also very creative. This leaning would say I'm left brained, but the test I took said I was right brained... just barely.

Is it possible that this is due in some way to all of that astrological nonsense? Is it possible that being caught between Aries and Pisces has had some devastating effect on my life and the way I am? Could that somehow explain why I would love to be a psychologist but see it as sacrificing everything I love to do?

I seem to be stuck in my own mind--wandering aimlessly in circles, having epiphanies that I had only a few years, maybe even months, before. I try to look at things in a different light, but I always seem to arrive at a conclusion that had already been reached at some earlier date. So what should I do? Should I become a psychologist or should I pursue film direction? Or should I try and achieve the impossible dream? Should I go for the shack in Rhode Island and sail around the world, shark diving all the way? Or should I stop thinking quite so much?

"Conflicted" is a word that comes to mind.